“The biggest mental leap for me was absolutely NO BINGING!”
To be where I am today in terms with my mental stance with food and my body, it has taken me a long time. My upbringing consisted of being around food all the time, because of the fact that my parents own a restaurant. Well, you can imagine that having endless food options available at your fingertips most of the time resulted in me being a little chubby kid. So how did a 10 year old think she could lose weight? I went to Google and obscene results like the “cabbage soup diet” or “the Lemonade diet” came up. Thank God I have a mother who absolutely refused to let me do that to my 10 year old self!
As I got older and obtained more responsibility, I was able to go though many phases of dieting without much detection from my parents. My vegan and raw fruit phase lasted about a whole day. Then I went through a weird phase where I would lock myself in my room and just chew gum (one time a whole pack in one night) to prevent myself from eating real food, or I would tell myself to go to sleep, to keep me from feeling hungry. One day I came across a nutrition program that suggested all “clean” and “lean” foods, I followed. Which was great, but being a girl who loves, and I mean LOVES, me a good maple bar doughnut or any type of doughnuts for that matter…well I had my moments. Moments that turned into full days, which would turn into a whole week or even weeks. One bite of something sweet, and that contained “bad” or “dirty” carbs would spin me out of control. Everything in sight would be consumed because in my mind, the whole day was ruined. If you have been through this, you know that if the binging does not make you want to throw up first then the guilt afterwards will. Nevertheless my clean eating attempts continued for years, along with my “moments”.
News flash! What I was doing to my body did not add up to weight loss. One plus one will always equal two, no matter how you swing it. I had become my heaviest, being 5’2” and 130lbs range, I was uncomfortable. At the time I was following SoBoss Coach Jamey on Insta who always talked about macros. When I did my own research on said macros I would get so overwhelmed, because I would find so many macro calculators online, each and everyone spitting out a different number. I asked Jamey how she calculated her macros (because she looks so dang good). To that end, Jamey introduced me to SoBoss and Jessi. I emailed Jessi and so it began.
Our first phone call I was shaking from being so nervous to share a story I’ve kept inside for so long. Jessi was the first person who made me feel normal. It was empowering knowing I was not alone in my struggles. It was then, when I told myself, it is time to stop playing the victim, and start being the protagonist in your own story, promising to love myself along the whole way. We decided to start with the body fat loss program (then reverse diet after). Jessi reiterated that I could have anything, I repeat, ANYTHING, as long as it fit my macros. I lost about 10lbs, but kept in mind the that the number on the scale was simply just a measure of progress being made. Jessi set me up for success, after about 22 weeks I had the confidence and mental tools of how to manipulate/calculate my own macros based on my goals. Biggest mental leap for me was absolutely NO BINGING! Consistency, sweat, and science is what gets results. So please if you are struggling, take the plunge and give yourself the love it deserves. Stop feeling guilty. My first week tracking, I was amazed that I could have an Oreo(s), not go crazy, and did not instantly put on fat. There is no “dirty” or “bad” foods. Instead the body recognizes fats, carbs, and protein. Altogether, that is what SoBoss has taught me, which is infinitely freeing.